Top Ten Words That Describe Most ESFJs:
Warm ... Responsible ... Attentive ... Talkative ... Enthusiastic
Sensitive ... Affectionate ... Sympathetic ... Outgoing ... Generous
EASY TO GET TO KNOW, SENSITIVE
Warm, high energy, talkative, friendly and highly emotionally intelligent, ESFJs are the quintessential “people” people, and tend to develop instant rapport with and bring out the best in virtually everyone. Energized most by a highly social environment, ESFJs tend to require very little alone time. They are perhaps the easiest type to get to know, usually sharing lots of detailed information about themselves early in conversations, and drawing the same out of others. Often feeling things more deeply than others, they have immediate emotional reactions that show up on their very expressive faces. They may have to force themselves to wait before responding when they feel emotionally charged. ESFJs are also the type most gifted at “reading” the emotional state and style of others – and adapting their style to be most pleasing to whomever they are with at the moment, being exceptionally diplomatic and cautious to avoid unnecessarily offending anyone.
CLOSURE ORIENTED, STABILITY FOCUSED
ESFJs value closure, tradition, and stability. They tend to ask a lot of specific, concrete questions of others in an effort to reach full clarity (and to make sure that everyone’s needs and desires are being met). This allows them to fulfill their driving need to have closure, to constantly be productive, and ensure that all their “ducks are in a row.” ESFJs are often the enthusiastic “cruise director” in their circle of friends/family: organizing traditions, celebrations, vacations, gifts, and the like. They tend to put others’ needs before their own, and often struggle to say “no” when asked for a favor - even if they are maxed out. ESFJs also tend to have a deep sense of duty and responsibility, and work hard to ensure that others feel well cared for by them. ESFJs like to feel that others view them as highly reliable and dependable.
EAGER TO PLEASE, CONSCIENTIOUS
ESFJs leave people feeling good about themselves and appreciated. ESFJs take great pleasure in contributing to others’ happiness by helping in concrete ways. Their strong desire to be well-liked, to be seen as nice, generous, and helpful, makes them highly supportive and generous with their energy and time. While no one can top an ESFJ in the level of attention, compliments, gifts and favors that they shower on those they love, ESFJs do tend to thrive on heavy and regular doses of positive affirmation in return, showing them that they are appreciated and liked as a person.
EXECUTION AND PROCESS FOCUSED
There are two phases of most projects or meetings: 1) the vision/strategy setting stage and 2) the execution stage. ESFJs often prefer the latter more concrete stage, where the vision is created, ideas generated, and time is focused on execution! If the coordinates are set and it is clear what action items need to take place, ESFJs are focused and driven to complete them as quickly as possible. Often, their skills are best used when the project requires taking an existing process, understanding all the detailed pieces of it, and then tweaking it for efficiency - versus starting with a more “blank page” type of project (the preference of their ENFJ colleagues).
ESFJs are detail people. They remember most details - such as what someone was wearing at an event, or specific names and dates. They have an especially great memory for details shared during conversations, and can often relay who said what, how it was phrased, and the order and flow of the conversation (not perfectly, of course).
Top ten: ESFJs are the type MOST likely to . . .
1. Over-extend themselves to help others in concrete ways
2. Get visibly emotional
3. Fall in love quickly and not easily see the shortcomings of others
4. Love kids from a very young age
5. Take things literally
6. Be described as: friendly, nice, sympathetic, generous, outgoing, affectionate
7. Naturally excel at identifying others’ personality and styles
8. Be very “put together” (clothes, hair, accessories) - most days
9. Share a lot of information about their life
10. Smile and laugh easily
11. Seldom require or desire stretches of alone time
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